I did it!!
One week ago, I wrote a Diary entry about the shame and embarrassment I experienced with promoting Breathe for the Girls (a breathwork event I hosted where 50% of the proceeds were donated to She is the Universe). I shared how I had set a stretch goal and didn't know if I would make it happen based on the initial lack of response. (click to read the Diary entry)
Instead of giving up on my goal, I doubled down on my inner work, and it totally paid off! I achieved several personal goals, including sending She is the Universe a donation for $1,045. To say I'm manifesting quickly these days feels like an understatement. I feel like all the pieces are finally falling into place, and it feels so freaking good!
I want to share the healing journey I took from last week to yesterday because I don't think people share this part of the work. Many people talk about how they make quantum leaps by taking bold actions. However, I believe it is really about the internal energy shifts that happen as you release limiting beliefs. Once you heal and step into your personal power, external actions get easier and more effective.
I wrote about my frustration with marketing to crickets. I couldn't seem to figure out why no one is signing up. I also realized that hosting this event for a cause was my way of tricking my mind into taking bolder action. The idea of doing this for someone else made it easier to ask for support.
I dug into the silent treatment energy and realized that I had been ignoring my own needs. I became aware of how I was neglecting myself, and the world was mirroring back that self-imposed deafness. Once I was aware of the limitation, I committed to hearing and responding to my own needs regularly. Then I tapped (using the emotional freedom technique - EFT) on the self-imposed deafness until the emotional reactivity was gone.
I did an oracle card reading for guidance on where I am blocking abundance, where I am supporting my abundance, and what I should know about each. The cards revealed that I was still holding on to the guilt and shame of my past failures. The reading also helped me to realize that I was placing the keys to my success in the hands of others. Instead of recognizing the courage it took to ask my friends for support, I focused on the lack of sign-ups. In essence, I was looking in the wrong direction.
I wrote a letter to Source thanking her for the guidance and clarity to align me with my natural state of limitless abundance. I thanked her for releasing the guilt, shame, and resentment I had been carrying, and I also thanked her for the honor to do this work and be in service to her, myself, and the collective. Then I did another round of EFT to release any doubt in myself and my capabilities.
I did a forgiveness meditation to release the judgment and insecurity from my younger years. I found myself repeating ho'oponopono every time my mind would try to ruminate on limiting thoughts or past failures. Then Spirit guided me to investigate my judgmental side and realized that I use judgment as a personal security blanket. This led to even more forgiveness, releasing, and belief rewriting.
This was a massive writing day for me. Not sure if it was something happening astrologically or if Source just knew it was time to go all in. I filled pages and pages of my notebook and as I emptied my mind onto the page, more information came into my awareness.
I discovered I was being a jerk to my business. Wanting to repair the relationship, I connected with her essence and learned that she wanted to be called Mysabow (My Sacred Body of Work). I offered healing and a renewed commitment to myself and Mysabow. (click here to read that Diary entry)
The Libra Full Moon message came back to me again, and I went on an internal scavenger hunt to find any areas in my life where I was acting needy, desperate, or clingy. My goal was to uncover any place in my life where my small, scared self was running the show. I also started joking about being on the Truth Train and noticing all of the opportunities that the Source gave me to stand in my power and speak my truth. (you can read more about that here)
Later that day, my prayer to Spirit was answered. I received wisdom from my Shaman, who inspired me to connect with my Inner Warrior. Her guidance led me to start writing and inviting people in from a space of sacred empowerment. The guidance also aligned with the direction I received from a copywriting course that I am currently in. The repeating messages to be direct were a clear reminder that Spirit will continue to send you the messages you need until you receive them loud and clear.
I started my morning with a scripting practice. I wrote about how I wanted to feel and the success I wanted to experience as if it had already happened.
Then, I tuned into the Aries new moon energy and received clarity on including a Sacred Warrior Activation in the Breathe for the Girls event. I received my own activation and then danced with wild abandon to the Breathe for the Girls playlist. I air punched, warrior yelled, and shook my body until it felt like I had released all the weight of my own expectations.
I wrote an email about the Sacred Warrior Activation and shared those words on my social media platforms. Six people signed up within a few hours.
I did a forgiveness meditation for the younger versions of me who could not speak up for themselves. I also gave myself forgiveness for unintentionally leading people on because I was afraid to hurt their feelings. I accepted any pain or harm I may have caused in the process by realizing I was doing the best that I could with what I knew at the time.
I started noticing a significant shift in my internal landscape. I have pages of notes commenting on how empowered, free, and embodied I felt. I noticed a new level of emotional resilience and found it easier to have hard conversations. I decided that I'm certainly not perfect, but I am enjoying this growing ability to have honest and direct conversations.
I tuned into the Aries New Moon and Inner Warrior energy again. I received another download of benefits for why this needs to be shared with as many people as possible. I also found myself repeating a couple of my favorite mantras "I am comfortable being uncomfortable. I didn't come here to play small" throughout the day.
I started exploring external validation and how to be in right relationship with who I am and what I am capable of. I shifted my focus from what is happening outside of me (ex. sign-ups, positive feedback, etc.) to what steps I am personally taking to grow, evolve, and feel free. This helped me to further release the need to watch my email for sign-up notifications.
I celebrated the courage it took to ask for support and be more direct in the asks I made to my community. I reaffirmed my unwavering devotion to this work regardless of how many people show up for it. I deeply connected with the inner knowing that I am doing this work because I can't imagine doing anything else.
Then I looked at my capabilities and focused on amplifying my faith in my healing process. I reminded myself that I know my tools work because they are the ones that I use every day. Giving myself that inner assurance allowed me to release the need to receive confirmation from others. I'm all for improvement feedback, but I don't need feedback to feel complete or competent in what I am doing.
I participated in a breathwork session that really rocked me physically and mentally. My intention was to surrender to the experience and just be myself. The practice took me on a deep dive into all the suppressed fear within me. This was a journey into the unknown that was unlike anything I've experienced before. It was scary and profoundly curious at the same time. It also reminded me why I love this body of work so freaking much!
During the last Breathe with Tiffany event, several people could not hear the music. So I tapped on the limiting belief that I have issues with the music and technology in my events. That led me to tap on a deeper limiting belief that things don't work out for me the way they are supposed to. Not gonna lie; I'm really excited to be letting that belief go!
Then I wrote a letter to Source thanking her for the sacred healing container of love and light for Breathe for the Girls. I thanked her for holding and supporting each individual and providing them exactly what they needed. I also thanked her for guiding my words and actions so that I could be of the highest service to all involved.
One hour before the event, I decided to check the registrations and noticed that I was only $88 away from making my goal of raising $1,000 for She is the Universe. A part of me jumped for joy at being so close, and another part wondered if I'd be able to make it. I heard a whisper from within say to trust that Source would provide, so I jumped in the shower to get ready. While I was in the shower, I received another download that said, "tell them!"
When I got out of the shower, I emailed my community and told them how close I was to making my goal. Then I opened the virtual doors to the event and led 20 individuals through one of the most magical and authentic sessions I've led to date. I was overflowing with joy by the time the event closed, and I knew within my own heart that the entire experience was a total success. The icing on the cake was checking my PayPal account to see that I had received $140 in donations in response to my email!
This experience was a personal breakthrough for me on so many levels. I feel like I healed several limitations, rewrote numerous beliefs, and unleashed my true power. To say I feel good is an understatement, and to think that this is only the beginning, blows my sweet little mind!